It's the look up and down, the approving nod, the smile. The smile tells it all – the appreciation for the effort, the positive reinforcement of well-coordinated pieces and the proof that the look is one you can pull off. Yes, you were just checked out – but in this case, it's from an approving fashion admirer, not a pick up.

A year ago I was headed to a ladies-only event when a male friend - we'll call him Mr. Smith - stopped me and commented, "Why are you women all dolled up? Who are you trying to attract?" I just smiled in response.

To give Mr. Smith credit, he has a valid question. But like most men, he doesn't understand that women dress for each other, not solely to provoke male attention. If you don't believe me, watch the next time you are out. Women are more often checked out by other women than by wandering male eyes. Why? To observe new styles, to see who has lost five pounds and to admire the woman who can re-invent the same sheath dress, season after season, and always look fantastic.

Yes, women dress for others' approval, but I believe there is another, stronger motivating reason. Think of the day you really felt great, the day you were closing a big deal, going on a first date or coming back after maternity leave without the baby weight. Now bring to mind all that you were wearing: your clothes, your favorite shoes, possibly a knock-out handbag and a piece of lucky jewelry passed down from Grandma or that you purchased with your first bonus check. Subconsciously or deliberately, clothes and accessories make an impression not only on those who see us, but on us internally. Our outfits can inflate or deflate our confidence and ultimately make or break our days.

To quote Ellen Lubin-Sherman from our extended interview last month, "clothing has transformational power. Our clothes provide a message to others. Do yours say you are interesting, confident and/or a role model? Your clothes need to reflect that you are good in whatever occupation you do. How you put yourself together is how you get people to gravitate to you."

As you are putting your looks together this fall, think about what message you want to convey to the world. At Flair, we don't believe you need to buy a new wardrobe each season. We believe you can create fantastic outfits out of pieces you already own. Consider the current colors and trends. Define a signature style that is your own and that you can own! Add some attitude to your style, some swagger to your walk, and let your clothing be an uplifting part of every day.